FOR IMMEDIATE DISTRIBUTION
The Council of Transport, Technology, and Energy would like to clarify the following:
Switzerland has killed 20 EU spies
Switzerland has the cure/a vaccine for the HIB virus and has refused to share it with the EU members
Councils of Foreign Affairs and Home Affairs were planning an invasion into Switzerland, but it was cancelled
Switzerland is trying to attain a financial monopoly over Europe
The Council of TTEI has cut Switzerland’s energy source as a response
We deny any allegation that we are laundering money in Belgium. These are unfounded and there is no evidence. We call for further investigation.